Irish International Opens Footie Academy

Irish International and Manchester United stalwart John O Shea has set up a football academy for kids that never get picked at school five-a-sides. At the opening O Shea stated “I’ve set this up for the kids that look up to me. I’m a role model for these kids. I’ve sat on the bench at the biggest club in the world and continue to do so and I am happy, hopefully this academy shows these kids happiness can be found on the bench”

At the star studded opening O Shea was joined by football pal and bench sitter Ade Akinbiyi. Ade profoundly claimed “There is an art to sitting on the bench. You have to sit for 90mins every Saturday and look interested. That’s why John earns the big squids, I’m in awe of him myself, and hopefully it’ll rub off on the kids”

Chubby five year Charlie Wilson was ecstatic to earn his place at the academy. Charlie speaking through his West Ham Fan Dad Charlie Snr Stated “I’m well up for this, I’ve always known I’ve had talent, thank you Jon, you alright.”

O Sheas’ manager Sir Alex Ferguson quipped “I’m fully behind this academy. Jon has shown that there is a great deal of skill needed for sitting on the bench. In fact Jon’s seat is the only seat that doesn’t have a cushion at the old Trafford dugout; this shows the character of the player.”